I don't want to seem disrespectful of the year. Plenty of nice and lovely stuff happened this year. Trust me, I am fully aware every day how much I have to be thankful for. The blessings (big and small) in my life are, frankly, more than I deserve. But there have also been a plethora of super shitastic things, that I for one, could have done without, thank you very much.
Each year I like to do a lil' mental round up of what the year brought me as I prep for the new things a new year will bestow upon me. Here, for the official BBG record are some of the high and low lights of 2011:
~Thanks to AnonD, I learned how to make the worlds best kick ass chocolate chip cookies. (Recipe) Because I helped, I earned a new title, 'The Primary Whisker'.
~A local 'feel good' story unfolded (and then quickly disintegrated) with the discovery of the golden voice, Ted Williams who found momentary national fame for morphing from an addiction riddled homeless beggar to the voice of a Kraft Mac and Cheese spot aired during the Super Bowl. ...And then just as quickly from the voice of creamy cheezy goodness to an addiction riddled, 'what ever happened to' cautionary tale?
~In other local ta-doin's, this is the year I had to hear the news announce that some schools would be closed not for snow, (ice, heat, fog, wind chill too low <-- all of which have happened in my lifetime), no, for wild animals roaming. Lions, tigers and bears, free ranging due to a unstable individual making bad choices. (56 exotic animals on the loose)
~I was rreminded how many people love me, in big ways and small. And all I can say is, WOW! And, of course, THANK YOU.
~2011 opened my palate to several new things: 1st Fruity Pebbles. (Love them!) Nonpareils. (Hated 'em.) Shamrock shake. (Severely disappointed by Ronald's offering.) Wheatgrass. (Wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. Sweeter than expected.) Quinoa. (Really surprisingly liked it.) Silk milk. (Thumbs down.) Hostess Pudding Pie (I thought it would be flaky goodness. It was not.) Pomegranate juice. (It tasted like if a grape and a blueberry had a baby.) Whole wheat pasta. (I'd rather eat actual dried and hardened glue strips.) And Chik 'N. (While not bad, soy based connective tissue is kinda creepy.)
~Yet again, I remain flabbergasted and saddened that science and technology haven't been able to invent a 'wayback machine'.
~Got my heart brrrrrrrrroken.
~Got my revenge and made a new friend.
~Engaged in a lotta schadenfreude. Mainly at the expense of one of Virginia's newest residents. The score since he's been there? One earthquake. One hurricane. One super early ass and quite unusual winter storm warning in October. Free range zebras roaming the streets. ...It ain't a plague of locust, but none of that seems like a good sign. It's called karma, asshole. Enjoy it. I sure as fuck am. Good luck, Virginia.
~I heard 9,9,9, more frequently than a week long Hitlerathon on the History Channel. Farewell,
~The BBGWorld hit 10,000 visitors.
~Finally, 2011 offered an option for when you can't decided if candy or booze is the answer.
~My first gray eyebrow hair.
Dear 1 Gray Eyebrow Hair~
I accept that you are here as a reminder that I'm gettin' old (& that I'm STILL ALIVE). In theory I am happy to let you live and share my face with you. Frankly, I find your single whiteness randomly interesting, however you seem to insist on bein' all helter skelter and incapable of not pokin' out and pointing skyward, and I'm not ok with bein' Andy Rooney. *Pluck!!*
~We became the home of World's Biggest Meatball (Finally. Last years BBG eyewitness account of the near miss)
~Dodged the rapture twice this year (May 21st and October 21st). So thank you Harold Camping and your predictions of the end of days for teaching me I just might be invincible. Or that I am part of the 'left behind' (at least I'm in good company, I mean, you're here too.)
~Nana became tech savvy. Ok, that might be an overstatement of the situation. Nana has made some semblance of peace with the laptop. Watching a DVD is out (it took all of 3 minutes and one ejection and putting it back in to determine that this wasn't happenin'), but she can Google, email and read her local paper.
~NASA provided me with an escape hatch from some of the assholes roaming this place. Helloooooooo Kepler22b!
~Uncle John tried to kill me.
~This is the year someone tried to tell me how to run my blog. (...Guess what's never gonna happen? Bueller?...)
~We learned the names Casey Anthony, Rebecca Black and Jerry Sandusky.
~I learned of the magical existence of natatoriums.
~For the first time ever I lost a nail. Completely down to the bed. (In happy nail news: Thankfully a new one replaced it.)
~Continued to be stalked
~Got some new lives to corrupt in Eden, Sammy and Asher. Congrats to Mrs. Steven Tyler kissed my ass (<-- really, I've seen pictures) and her hubby K1. Two kids have never been so wanted, or will be so cherished. And haaaaappy 1st boy congrats to Lupe & Jorge. Those are some lucky ass kids.
~Gone too soon...
A pioneer in how women deal with breast cancer. Before Betty Ford they were words that were whispered. After Betty Ford it became something that was fought. Betty Ford was also the catalyst behind
...Now what will we do? RIP Heavy D.
Smokin' Joe Frazier.
I once met 1/2 of the Thrilla in Manila duo (Ali being the other, for you non sweet science followin' peeps) at some black tie fundraiser shin dig. It was well after his boxing days, more the heyday of his BBQ days. He seemed nice. I mean, as long as I smiled, giggled and nodded in agreement, at least. Honestly, I never understood a word he said. The "discussion" made a strong case for headgear in the ring.
And Oprah, who while still alive did leave the airwaves this year.
Baby New Year, I'm ready for all of your 2012 goodness, bring it.
Haaaaaappy New Year!!